


Diary Series: Entry #2

by Noaner



Series: Winchester Diaries [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-20
Updated: 2010-08-20
Packaged: 2017-10-11 04:31:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/108427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noaner/pseuds/Noaner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is not the only Winchester with things to work out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Diary Series: Entry #2

**Author's Note:**

> Again AU, but this is set during Season 1.

Diary Entry #2

 

Being the older sibling can suck sometimes and I'm not talking about in a good way here. There is the usual stuff: being the older sibling and all we get yelled at more often and do stupid stuff first because we being the oldest have no one to watch make mistakes first. So we are the test cases. There are some perks though, namely being able to do stuff first and being able to pick on one's younger siblings if you feel like it. As most would expect I am that kind of older brother.

Course Sammy is soooooo easy to get. Sam scuse me. The little shit says his name is Sam when he knows good god damn well that I will always call him Sammy for the rest of his days. As the oldest I got to hold the guns first and use them and go hunting first with Dad. Grant you Sammy didn't like hunting after a while so it is a perk only I acknowledge.

There is other stuff about being the older sibling that are not perkish and hence we come to the sucky parts. Ever since mom died it has been my job to look out for Sammy and he has made it a very hard job indeed. I love my little brother though not that he'll ever hear those words from my mouth. I visited him at Stanford when he wasn't looking and made sure he was okay. I'll admit I'm bitter that he went away and left us, and I can't even begin to let go of those feelings despite the fact that I have mellowed a bit about the issue since Jessica died and all. I don't know if we'll ever really work out that issue or dealing with Dad .

After my heart attack and almost dieing I'm beginning to see Sam's point of view, because Dad didn't call to see if we were okay. Even if I had died I would have expected him to come for Sammy. My little bro would have needed comfort even if it had been Dad and I love the man but he sucks at comfort. Anyway looking after Sam is a full time job even though he is mostly capable of looking out for himself. The dreams though which I'm not sure at this point are totally on the level keep him from sleeping properly anymore and that isn't good, not for his hunting prowess though you didn't hear that from me or for his health. I mean damn he looks worse then I did when I was in the hospital dieing.

So I both love and hate having to watch out for Sam and despite what he thinks I'm not thinking this job is the end all be all of the world but I'm good at it and trained for it and maybe one day if I'm still alive I'll settle down with Sammy somewhere like he thinks is proper and try this normal life thing, for his sake and maybe just a little bit for my own sake, Because I have to tell you I'm damn tired and together we make for a ragged pair of hunters. My wish is that we stay healthy enough to do this stuff and save people and then I'll let Sammy get first crack at Dad when we find him, because order or not we are going to find him.

That is a Winchester promise.


End file.
